REPORT: 2 out of 3 gay men in Potts Point have slept together. The 3rd one watched.

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"I just love living in such a tight-knit cummunity. I mean community."

In news that will shock no one, a new report has revealed most gay men in Potts Point have buried the weasel with each other, or at least had some form of 'hands and faces'.

The report, which was conducted entirely anecdotally in just a few short minutes outside Health Nuts, also revealed that the few ugmos who hadn't managed to hit a home run with every 2011 resident had at least been in the room whilst someone else did.

Local man, Terry, who owns a spandex Spiderman costume with the words 'Your Friendly Neighbourhood Slut' embroidered on it, reckons it's a public safety issue.

"I just feel more comfortable knowing every inch of my neighbours," says Terry. "I mean, I don't know if I can trust someone, let alone look them in the eye, until I've had my head in their lap, y'know? It just puts me at ease."

Terry also asked us to list his phone number and address here publicly. But we will not. Put in the work, Terry.

Sean Corcoran