Man’s 3am Grindr login leads to night of intimate, memorable and totally satisfying sex
Local hornbag, George, had a completely unregrettable night of intercourse last night with a perfect stranger; and he has the innovative hookup app Grindr to thank.”
“It was 3am,” says George, “and I was feeling frisky.”
“So I opened up my inbox and suddenly became inundated with a whole host of well-articulated greetings, matched with extremely high quality photos of solid 10s. Not a single blurry hole pic in sight.”
“After some highly engaging banter, and securing a solid insurance policy of thirty 4K photos, I arranged to meet Franklin at his totally cute sharehouse that definitely wasn’t an $80 Uber away from where I lived. When I arrived, Franklin looked even better than his photos. It turns out he was a model. And not DNA model. Like, ACTUAL model.”
“We cut straight to the chase, and tumbled into his immaculately clean room where his 3-speaker Sonos system drowned out any potential awkwardness."
"Three minutes into the sesh, I definitely wasn't regretting every single action that had lead up to that very moment. I definitely wasn't losing interest mid-plow, wondering if they'll bring back Scarlet Envy for All Stars 5. And I definitely wasn't starting to think that this guy's feet kinda stink."
"It was honestly just incredible. Passionate. Surprising. Sex perfection really. Sexfection."
"I finished up. Left. And as I stood in the gorgeous rain outside his house waiting for my Uber home, all I could think about was how great my night had become. All thanks to Grindr. The most wonderful app in the world."
"I couldn't wait to tell my friends all about my totally non-shameful night, and how I really hoped to bump into Franklin in the checkout line at Coles someday while holding a bag of onions."
"In the truest sense of the phrase, I regretted nothing."