Friend in group announces post-Mardi Gras "vow of celibacy" and yeah ok

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Ever the dramatic, Kieran has just proclaimed that he's going to completely stop having sex altogether following an especially whorish Mardi Gras weekend.

This isn't the first time Kieran's made an outlandish promise he definitely won't live up to.

Earlier this year he vowed to stop watching Drag Race following Manilla Luzon's elimination, and yet within days he was back hosting viewing parties and demanding all his friends get matching 'Club 96' tattoos. (Ew. Jesus. Gross.)

Unbeknown to him, Kieran's friends, along with his mum, have all taken bets on how long this "vow" will last.

"Oh my son won't last more than a few days", says Rhonda. "Kieran's been a thirsty boy ever since he was on the teet, I reckon he'll be back to his suckling ways in no time."

Sean Corcoran