Emoji-illiterate daddy evacuates apartment after receiving numerous flames on Insta

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"Burnt eggplant? Is that how the fire started?"

Sydney chiropractor, Phil, has had quite the bewildering introduction to social media after mistakenly calling the fire brigade three times in one day.

The confusion started when Phil, looking great for his age, received multiple flame emojis on his newly created Instagram account.

"They just kept coming, so I naturally assumed there was a fire somewhere and spreading fast," said Phil.

"I told all the guys to get down low and go-go-go, and then sent back some informative spurting water emojis. But then they just asked for my address?"

Phil has since been brought up to speed with emoji culture, and subsequently now has a fully booked weekend.

Sean Corcoran