Gay man finds Holey Moley not as promising as it sounds

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"I feel cheated."

 

Tim, a Mosman man who is used to having to get in his car for a bit of booty anyway, has been left extremely disappointed after a late-night drive to Kings Cross' Holey Moley.

Having heard good things on social media, but failing to really look into it, Tim arrived at the venue in his favourite leather vest, assless chaps and carrying a 5 litre tub of Cetaphil he got on special at ALDI.

After inserting himself into various themed holes, but meeting only a grassily synthetic dryness, Tim finally started to put two and two together and zipped up, much to the disgust of onlookers.

"My hearing isn't what it used to be," says Tim. "I thought my friend said he came here for butt-butt. But I was wrong. Very wrong. I guess the cross just isn't what it used to be."

Tim reportedly then went to go try his luck at "Jangling Dacks". We think he meant Jangling Jack's.

Sean Corcoran